The Devil Came to Town

deal with Carl Jnr in private...


He needed to apply the ointment the Doctor had prescribed. He remembered getting pissed; he remembered thinking that a tattoo would be cool. He didn’t remember asking for it to look like the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Although he thought it looked cool hanging at that odd angle. Carl Jnr hey, I guess from now on it will have to be Giuseppe....

 

Giuseppe... he pondered ..that's too many darn syllables and decided to go with Guido, since it's more appropriate for when the tower ain't leanin.

So off wandered Carl , with Guido soundly asleep. After a few blocks the area became familiar and Carl then ran into an old friend named Frank. Now Frank used to really have his way with the ....

 

...ladies. That was until his alter ego started acting up and took over. Now the ladies saw Frank as...

 

a fried plantain served as a side to a huge bowl of PAELLA.
Carl thought to himself i can't DEAL w/ Frank right now, so he did a quick howdydo and a promise to go to the midget tranny mudwrestling tournament that's coming to town in 3 weeks. As Carl continued on his way he looked at his watch , and thought how in tarnation did it get to be 10pm already !? He decided a quick chili dog - xtra spicy would hit the spot before he went to bed.
As he got comfy in the bed and drifted off, a chili dog induced nightmare of a scandalous
nature began that had Carl being chased by ....

 

dozens of nubile, scantily-clad young women. And could it be, yes it was!! Thelma was leading them!!

 

Thelma started to change, as did the rest of the throng, they were now a hoard of Venusian hermaphrodite’s, he kept running but he didn’t seem to move. They soon engulfed him, they started too changed before his very eyes yet again, every one of them started to look like Phyllis Diller. They took out there teeth in unison and all started to laugh, it was her laugh all right, that slow manic slightly evil laugh that only Phyllis Diller could emanate. Come give your old granny a kiss they all said at once. This and the sight of a thousand of these creatures all puckering up was more than Carl could stand….He woke with a shudder and flung the sheets off, the stench was terrible, it was like being stuck in a room with a thousand Bulbophyllum echinolabium blooms. Damn chili dogs, this was absolutely the last time, he knew he shouldn’t eat them, he went to take a crap and started to think about Thelma...

 

and as he sat on the crapper a knock was heard on the door , it opened and it was the thong wearing Venusian Hermaphrodite Phyllis Diller clones all 700 of them trying to french kiss him, with a big flush Carl finally awoke from the nightmare to find his dog Pepe licking his face (yes, in the mouth dog kisses *shudder*) . Carl glances at the clock and darn if he hasn't been asleep for 10 hours. After a quick shower and a shave, Carl heads off to work at the Brewery where he is in charge of R & D and he really would like to make a brew using ......